I Gloat Thee!

I so apologize that it has been such a long break in my posts.  You must, however, understand that I am at the mercy of The Queen and when she is away from her 'puter.  She has been taking it to work with her so I have not been able to post as in the past.  Even when she is home in the evenings she is on it constantly, so no chance then either.


Anyway, I was able to get this post done before she came back (she's been in the Classroom working on "swaps" for someplace she is going that is salty for something called "convenshun".  Don't ask me, I can't keep up with her.

You can see in this picture that I have let my hairs grow long.  The Queen doesn't like that, and she uses her loud voice to tell me that I leave my hairs everywhere.  Well, yes, that's what I do...I am a handsome feline specimen with flowing tresses that can blow in the wind (if I were ever allowed outside, which I'm not!).  Anyway, nothing do but that The Athlete pack me away in the evil suitcase and take me to the V.E.T. so the groomer can take care of my flowing tresses.  This is translated to mean that The Queen wants me shaved.


Well, I really am getting used to the evil suitcase, and I don't actually mind the groomer lady.  She told The Athlete today, that in her 30 years of grooming cats, I am the most well behaved feline she has ever encountered.  Yes, she really did!  She went on to say that I am the best because she can lay me on my side and I stay there and let her do what she needs to do, without protest.  See?  I AM wonderful!  She actually told The Athlete that they were lucky to have me!  


I will close this post by saying to The Queen and The Athlete three little words... "I gloat thee!".

See how big?

I am a big handsome feline.  I barely fit into this box because I am so big.  Don't mind the chew marks on the flaps of this box.  I am a bit obsessed with cardboard.  

The Queen is always nagging me about why I chew on the flaps of the boxes that The Athlete leaves out for me.  I do not understand why she gets so upset, it is just a habit I have.  Just like stamping is HER hobby.  


The Athlete always puts the boxes away, after I have chewed on all four flaps.   I guess he understands me, you know, being a guy and all.  It is just my way of staking my claim.  The Queen, however, does not appreciate my teeth marks on any of her stuff.      


I also am concerned that it is getting close to time to get all my hairs cut.   The Queen said that I am leaving clumps all over the house.  The last time she said that, The Athlete took me in the evil suitcase to a groomer and left me all day.  


I must try to remember to pick up my hairs.  I don't like trips in the evil suitcase.

Let's get comfy!

I just don't understand my humans.  The Queen has a new 'puter table...one that rolls right up to "her" chair.  Whoop-de-doo!  She's always getting new stuff.  Hrrrmppff!


Sometimes, when she sits down to check emails or surf, she only sits on a teeny tiny part of the chair, in the very front, leaving all that luscious softness at the back empty and unused.  


Soooo...many times I will sneak in behind her and take possession.  After all, it is usually in the evening, when she should be going to bed anyway.  Know what I mean?


However, the problem is sometimes I don't realize just how comfortable this chair is, and I stretch a bit too much, alerting her to the fact that I am there, behind her!


Oh well, it is great while it lasts.  I am a Ninja! 

Boring...

Nothing exciting happening here.  Same old, same old.


The Queen was mad at me the other day because I urped on her carpet.  I couldn't help it...I had a stomach bug...yeah, that was it.  Not that I scarfed down my Fancy Feast way too fast...of course not.


I laid around looking pathetic for a while...like I could hardly lift my head, I was so weak....and she caved and started petting and loving on me.


SCORE!  She is such an easy mark.

Stress Reliever

Now THIS is what I'm talking about.  

Why do I not have one of these?

Be Kind...

I just learned that this is Be Kind to Animals Week.  I don't think my humans even know about it though.


The Queen totally blew me off yesterday while she was working in the yard.  I wanted to come outside to help keep the birds away, but she told me I had to stay inside where I wouldn't run away.


The Athlete, who normally is easy to manipulate to getting things my way, wouldn't even consider letting me take over his chair for my afternoon nap.  He even had the audacity to tell The Queen not to let me on the interwebs.  The very nerve.  (But he went to bed early, so I am able to post here on my blog anyway!)


I just hope if you have animals that you will do something nice for them this week.  I know this is only Monday, and my humans might have something big planned for later in the week, so I won't throw a fit just yet.  My paws are crossed...

Flowers...for me?

So The Queen comes home tonight carrying this vase of flowers and sets them down on the coffee table.


I immediately went to investigate the aromas coming from them, and tried to figure out what they were.  I thought they had to be for ME, she set them down right in front of me.  What would YOU think?


But wait, I heard her tell The Athlete that they were HERS...really?  Fine.  I don't really care.  Seriously, I don't.


But they do smell wonderful...just don't tell her I said that!